Taking 20% of Your Time To Follow Your Dreams & Also I Will Never Be a Singer & That's OK
Living Happy
Way back in 2009, there was this massive and celebratory response to Susan Boyle's performance of I DREAMED A DREAM on Britain's Got Talent and it made me think about my own dreams. Susan was this 47-year-old lady with an amazing voice who wowed them on that television show, which I think is like American Idol or The Voice, sort of. I'm not sure. I’m bad at TV things.
People expected her to suck, mostly because she did something with her hips before she sang and because she was not super model beautiful on the outside. She said she's always wanted to be a professional singer, to sing in front of a super big audience. People snickered.
Then she sang.
She did not suck.
People cried.
And I totally wanted to be her. I wanted to be the one singing and making people gasp and cry and stand on their knees all because of my voice.
Singing like Susan? That's not a dream I'll ever get.
First off, I was never even in show choir. And I have never auditioned for American Idol.
But I was in this cheesy song and dance company.
We wore costumes like this
But let me say: I was paid.
So, I think this counts as being a professional singer, right? *clears throat* Of course, we played places like Chuck E' Cheeses or the Masonic temple in Manchester, NH.
Sarah Silverman (actress/comic/writer) was also in the group. So was Bridget Walsh, the third national-touring ANNIE! I was totally out classed. I never had one of those big show-stopping solos.
I also never got to perform with a dog. ;(
I don't think I ever will. I kind of gave up on that dream, which is totally okay.
In a piece for Psychology Today, Jennifer Caspari Ph.D. writes about how self-doubt can be a big obstacle when it comes to going after your dreams. She also lists some steps that she believes will help, which are:
“Identify what it is you want.
“Reflect on your values: What is meaningful and important to you and how does your goal align with your values?
“Cultivate a helpful mindset. Use encouraging self-talk. For example, “Why not me?” “I am as capable as anyone else.” “I can do this.” “It is important to me to go after what I want.” “I am worthy of taking action.”
“Set an intention: What is your aim or purpose (and carve out time to reflect on and visualize your goal)?
“Create a plan for taking action. Be specific and realistic. What is one concrete step you can take toward your goal?
“Take action. It is helpful to start small and chip away at a larger goal over time.
“Review what is working and change your action plan, as needed.”
I did give up on that singing dream, but I never gave up on the dream of writing. I am still working on that one. Someday, I want to write in a way that people sing. I want people to gasp and feel and laugh and be on that journey with me, because of my words.
The Long Game: How to Be a Long-Term Thinker in a Short-Term World by Dorie Clark also has a pretty cool approach to going after dreams. She recommends investing 20% of your time into building toward dreams in an open-minded way.
In an interview with Michael Schein she said, “Of course, you have your present reality, and it’s important to take care of that. At the same time, if you can devote 20% of your time to something you’re deeply interested in, it’s incredible what that can result in. Google has their 20% time policy. People can gain a lot by doing this in their own lives. If you’re not crazy about where you are right now, consistently spend little bits of time on other things over a long enough time horizon, and you'll eventually get unstuck.
“The other thing that tends to worry people a lot is that when they do think about making a transition or shifting paths, it feels very risky like leaping off a cliff. But if you give yourself a long enough runway, you're not leaping into anything.”
This is pretty brilliant, actually.
Do you have dreams? Are you still going for them? Are you feeling unmotivated? If so check out that video because Susan didn't give up on her dream and for a few minutes (and possibly longer) her voice was all that mattered.